


Just One Person

by Flynne



Series: Lynnie Amell [2]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: F/M, Lynnie Amell, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-05
Updated: 2018-05-05
Packaged: 2019-05-02 09:19:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14541567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flynne/pseuds/Flynne
Summary: Lynnie and Alistair have a late night talk after driving the darkspawn from the Circle Tower.





	Just One Person

Lynnie pulled her bedroll closer to the fire, sitting cross-legged on the mat and leaning towards the blaze in a vain attempt to warm herself. The campsite was well out of sight of the Circle Tower, but she still seemed to feel it looming behind her, an icy shadow at her back.

She’d felt cold ever since awakening from the Fade, despite the exertion of the battle afterward. The wounds she’d sustained during the fight to retake the tower had been relatively minor, considering what could have been, and Wynne had healed what Lynnie herself could not, but the shivery feeling lingered - a chill that had nothing to do with her surroundings and everything to do with the sinister echo of her thoughts:  _It could have been you._

Her heart clenched with loss as she remembered counting the familiar faces after the battle. Too few, far too few. She, Alistair, Wynne, and a reluctant Morrigan had stayed to help clean a few rooms and make them habitable for the survivors to sleep in for the night, but she couldn’t bear the thought of staying in her former home and she’d led the way back to camp as soon as Irving could spare them. Her vision blurred with exhaustion as she stared into the fire, and the headache that had been threatening for hours finally sank its claws into her skull. She shut her eyes with a wince, the light from the fire flickering blood-red through her eyelids.

In spite of her grim thoughts, her mouth turned up in a small smile when she heard the padding of massive paws behind her. Krogan snuffed her hair, warm breath ruffling the loose strands about her face. The mabari’s cold nose pressed against her cheek for a moment before he flopped down beside her with a sigh, shoving his heavy head into her lap.  

“I missed you, too,” Lynnie murmured. She propped an elbow on her knee, leaning her head on her hand. Her fingers rubbed slow circles on her pounding temple while she stroked the short, soft hairs on the top of Krogan’s head with her other hand. The fire heated his thick fur, and even though she still shivered, his contented affection began to warm her when the heat of the flames had failed.

More footsteps approaching behind her - boots thudding against the earth. She didn’t turn, too weary and heartsore to be curious, but after a moment Alistair stepped into her line of sight. He bent to offer her the steaming cup in his hand. “Here. You look like you need this.”  

Lynnie caught the scent of a familiar herbal tea that she had been taught to make for headaches. “I suppose it’s a bit obvious,” she said dryly. She stopped rubbing her head and accepted the drink, curling both hands around the warm tin cup. “You made this?”

“It would be more impressive if I said yes,” Alistair replied, sitting on the ground beside her, “but I must confess that I don’t know how. I asked Leliana to make it.” He mimicked her pose, sitting cross-legged with his elbows propped on his knees.

Despite her weariness, she found that she could manage a smile. “Thank you.”  

He smiled in return, looking pleased with himself. “You’re welcome.”  Lynnie slowly sipped the hot tea. The metal cup added a sour tang to the slightly-bitter brew, but it wasn’t bad, and her cold fingers began to thaw. “That was impressive,” Alistair said after a moment, tilting his head curiously, “the way you fought that sloth demon. I knew you were talented but you’re a lot stronger than I gave you credit for.”

She grimaced, remembering room after room in the Fade filled with abominations and hurlocks. It had been a rather steep learning curve. “I’m stronger  _now_ , at any rate. It’s a bit of a long story.”

“And…did I see you turn into a  _golem?_ ”

“Like I said, a long story.” She looked at him carefully. His voice was as cheery as ever, but there was a wary look to his eyes that she wasn’t sure how to interpret.

But then the look vanished as his mouth quirked in a teasing smile. “Could you do it again? Here, now?”

That surprised a huff of laughter out of her. “I don’t think so.”

“What else could you turn into?”

She shrugged. “Oh, a mouse, a spirit, a burning skeleton…”

“Are you serious?” His eyes went wide. “I was joking! How did you…? Let me guess. Long story,” he said, rolling his eyes and making her smirk. “Is it one you’re planning on telling? It’s not very nice to keep us all guessing.”

“I’ll tell you,” she promised. “But later. I don’t…” She glanced around at the darkness at the edge of camp. The firelight made the night seem even darker outside the warm circle of its glow. “…I don’t want to talk about it now.”

Alistair looked at her thoughtfully but didn’t press. He fell silent, staring absently at the glowing embers while Lynnie resumed scratching Krogan’s ears.  She’d thought she wanted to be alone, but she found that Alistair’s presence was not unwelcome.  Leliana was kind, but still a stranger, and Sten and Morrigan were prickly and uninterested in conversation. True, she had Wynne with her now, but the older woman was dealing with her own loss. Perhaps some people found comfort in sharing sorrows, but seeing Wynne’s grief just made Lynnie’s all the sharper. But even before they’d discovered the tragedy at the Circle, Alistair had surprised her by being the easiest member of her party to talk to.  _Aside from you, of course,_  she added silently, smiling down at the mabari snoring in her lap. So, after a moment, she broke the silence and said, “I’m a bit surprised to see you out and about. I thought you’d be in your tent cleaning your armor for the rest of the night.”

He grimaced. “So did I.  But you’d be surprised how fast you can work when you’re trying to get rid of darkspawn stink. I’m still not sure if I’ve got it off my hands.”  He pushed up the sleeves of his shirt and gave his wrists a wary sniff.

Lynnie’s mouth twitched upward again, but her smile was checked by the thought that most of the blood and gore she had cleaned from her own armor that evening had come from former friends. She hadn’t chosen a very good line of conversation.

Alistair saw her mood shift. The humor faded from his face, and his voice was much quieter than usual when he finally spoke. “What are you thinking?”

“It could have been me.” The words escaped before she could stop them. Her throat closed behind them, and she had to swallow a sip of tea before she could speak again. “It sounds so selfish,” she said bitterly. “My friends are dead, and all I can say is ‘it could have been me’. _Would_ have been, if Duncan hadn’t recruited me. For years, I’d wanted to leave the tower, and when I actually did…”  Her eyes stung. “The only thing to be glad about is that I couldn’t recognize them. At least, I couldn’t recognize the mages. I knew the templars by their armor.” She sniffled. “I keep thinking if I’d just been there - ”

“Lynnie…”

“I know it’s not true,” she went on, speaking over him but unable to keep her voice from shaking. “I know. But I can’t stop myself.”  For several minutes, the only sound was the crackle of burning wood and Krogan’s soft snores. She wiped tears from her cheeks, the salt trails drying quickly in the heat from the fire.

“If…” A chuckle huffed from Alistair’s chest, but the sound it made was more broken than humorous. “If I’d been there, with Duncan…” His mouth quirked up in a sad, twisted little smile. He shrugged. “I can’t stop myself from thinking about it either.”

Learning that Alistair understood how she felt came as a surprise, and despite the ache of loss, she felt the ice in her blood begin to fade. She sighed softly, staring down at the dark ripples in her tea. “I suppose one person can’t really make a difference.”

“Sometimes no,” came the quiet answer.  Lynnie lifted her head to look at him again, and the bitterness faded from his face as he met her gaze. “But sometimes one person can make all the difference. Duncan was just one person, and what he did saved us. And you…well, look at what you did back at the tower. The rest of us were trapped in the Fade, but…” He cut himself off with an awkward shrug. Lynnie gave him a curious glance but didn’t speak. Certainly Wynne had a clear recollection of the Fade, and Morrigan was a powerful enough mage to remember as well, even without formal training…not that she would ever bring it up. But Lynnie hadn’t been sure how much Alistair remembered, and she wasn’t going to ask about it. Whether or not his Fade-dream had been accurate, it had felt intensely personal and since he hadn’t shared anything about a sister with her in the waking world, she wasn’t going to take advantage of what the Fade had pulled from his mind and ask him about it.

The silence built between them again until he gave himself a little shake and continued as if he hadn’t stopped speaking. “…at any rate…well. Sometimes just one person is enough.”  

Lynnie’s expression softened. It wasn’t quite a smile, but it was the best she could manage. “I suppose you’re right.”  

“Of course I am. You should be used to that by now.” He could only manage a weak echo of his usual airy confidence, but it was enough to dissolve the last of the strain that had arisen at the mention of the Fade.

Alistair hadn’t mentioned Duncan since they’d left the Korcari wilds and the ruin of Ostagar behind them, but Lynnie knew he still felt his mentor’s loss keenly. She hadn’t brought that up either, not knowing when would be the right time, but hearing his name provided her with an opening. “I regret how we parted,” she ventured softly. “Duncan and me, I mean. I was angry with him, but…I thought I’d have the chance to set things right. I really did mean what I said when we made our truce.”

“I know you did,” he answered quietly. “I also know that he would have understood. He wouldn’t have held your anger against you. You don’t have to worry about that.”

“Thank you for saying so.” Lynnie wiped her brimming eyes on the edge of her sleeve.

In the silence that followed, Krogan rumbled sleepily and lifted his head to nudge her arm. It was a gentle bump for a mabari, but Lynnie only just managed to prevent the tea from sloshing over the rim.  She let out a watery laugh, shifting the cup to her other hand so she could scratch behind his ears again. “I’m sorry.  Was I forgetting you?” He let out a happy grumble and leaned his bulk more heavily against her.

Alistair chuckled softly and Lynnie looked up to share his smile. And she found that, for the first time since she’d entered the Circle Tower, she didn’t feel cold anymore. 


End file.
